And then if you talk to others, put yourself out there, or just pay attention to what’s going on - you realize your experience is not necessarily unique — may be unique to you but others are, or have been, there. 

Sometimes sharing helps others (the premise to my personal art). Sometimes paying attention to others helps you. 

This was brought to my attention again because, as pumped as I was to try and make February a fun month, I’ve had several ups and downs in trying to maintain and motivate that. I’ve come to a point in this month where I'm feeling low in spirit as I can't travel, bored with all of the pandemic restrictions and in turn how I'm spending my time, less optimistic about the recovery timelines, and while I offer virtual sessions that can entertain and inspire (and love hosting them), I haven’t actually looked at the same for me personally.

Working on my art most often gets me through these stages of emotion but I’m also feeling like I haven’t done enough with my time outside of that (and outside of all the things I’ve done or am doing for the studio). So while I am ‘busy’ I need to expand my world to use my time more effectively for me to experience growth, happiness and yep, you guessed it - back to my word of the year - experiment ! 

I was chatting with a friend recently and said we’ve had all this time due to the pandemic to learn something new (soooo many options out there virtually) but what have we done ? what are we doing ? Eventually, hopefully, we’ll look back and say look what I did with my time not why didn't I do something with that time !? 

Looking forward to events or experiences looks very different than it did over the last few years. At this time of year I’m usually gone or packing to go on a creative retreat in a sunny destination - this year I’m looking at bright whites of snow and feeling icy breezes and watching cold grays of the lakes that surround us. [Perhaps that’s contributed to my working mostly in black and white these days lol.] Now looking forward is planning an online birthday party for a friend; last night I shared some amazing memes with a friend from a wonderful trip we had together to Barcelona; this weekend I’ll connect with two artists I know in Barbados; over the next few weeks I’ll continue to look forward to the artists salon conversations I host for the studio; and I’ll get my act together to launch in to the things “I’ve always wants to do and didn’t have time to or rather, didn’t take the time to do. 

Happy to say I've arrived at the moment where I am going to banish the boredom, the feeling sorry for self and pursue some new activities - I’m thinking : 

- time to get back to learning Spanish in a more comprehensive, dedicated fashion; 

- take the time to READ those books I glance through; 

- play with clay; 

- still can’t bring myself to LOVE cooking but if I at least plan and explore new recipes again, bring some of the meal and food prep lessons I’ve learned on retreats including the not to waste, consider the privileges I have regular access to in terms of ingredients and accessibility, appreciate it more and do better; 

- continue to reach out and coordinate friend virtual parties & chats; 

- look outside of my own comfort zone and help an organization that can use some of my skills or the time I do have outside of the studio.

Yep, that's how I used my morning coffee ritual and meditation - pondering the direction to address these issues I've been having. Maybe none of my ideas turn your crank but I urge you to find what does and/or reach out to someone you might know is feeling this and encourage them to do the same.

So while this post has been all about me, I’m part of the world and the world is part of me, so I have to reach out and recognize how I can contribute to it in other ways and keep on keeping on. Wished me luck and I hope you do the same.