do your team members feel like you hear them?
karen klucowicz • August 19, 2020
the art of listening versus hearing, being in the moment, outcomes...
Focus on communicating.
Remember when your mom or maybe your boss would say ‘I know you’re listening to me but do you HEAR me?’ I sure do and I even understand what’s meant by it...now. It’s an ongoing effort and something I think we should all do a check-in on occasionally.
Being “in the moment” is not some woowoo sentiment. It is a difficult feat and one that we should always try to achieve. Even when you’re multi-tasking, or juggling multiple projects and deadlines you must stop and focus on the current item in hand. In a team setting, it’s about valuing opinion, ideas, responding, challenging and accepting. In other words, it’s about communication.
When you’re working with a team of people sometimes opportunities are missed if the members aren’t heard.
Here are a few checks and balances to determine how you’re doing:
• Listen to yourself; are you rushing head on or delivering your ask or message in a meaningful way?
If it’s direct interaction - virtually or in person:
• Stop your brain from jumping ahead; stay with the current item try not to think about the next question, statement or direction until the current one is complete;
• Focus on voice; yours and theirs - intonations, hesitancy, urgency in tone may mean more than the actual words;
• Body language (virtually or in-person) - together with voice and words personal presentation and movement will also give you valuable insight to the conversation;
• Allow thoughts to be finished before moving on - don’t ‘fill in the blanks’ - ask questions to get the full message, and then ask if it is complete don’t assume.
If it’s a written format (emails or chats):
• Make sure the message has a clear start, ask and finish; get clarification on the responses if you’re not clear;
• If the conversation is getting convoluted in writing ... pick up the phone!
With my art, I work somewhat in reverse - I begin with an internal conversation and when I put the painting out there I’m delivering a message. I appreciate that my intentions are not always what is received however I also know that they can act as a catalyst to open the conversation up and that is equally satisfying to me. If you work with introverts you might want to open the team up to this type of contribution.
All that to say — hear the people you’re interacting with so you that you receive their full intention.
Isn’t that what ‘active listening’ is about?
Do you solicit feedback from your team? Do you acknowledge it? If you are having a difficult time getting them to contribute their thoughts do you try other methods to attain them?
If you don’t or aren’t able to incorporate their input into a plan do you communicate the reasons to them?
Your consideration of these thoughts and relay of information to them on all of this, will help them feel heard even if you can’t accommodate their ideas.
Feel free to share some of your own checks and balances...
Being “in the moment” is not some woowoo sentiment. It is a difficult feat and one that we should always try to achieve. Even when you’re multi-tasking, or juggling multiple projects and deadlines you must stop and focus on the current item in hand. In a team setting, it’s about valuing opinion, ideas, responding, challenging and accepting. In other words, it’s about communication.
When you’re working with a team of people sometimes opportunities are missed if the members aren’t heard.
Here are a few checks and balances to determine how you’re doing:
• Listen to yourself; are you rushing head on or delivering your ask or message in a meaningful way?
If it’s direct interaction - virtually or in person:
• Stop your brain from jumping ahead; stay with the current item try not to think about the next question, statement or direction until the current one is complete;
• Focus on voice; yours and theirs - intonations, hesitancy, urgency in tone may mean more than the actual words;
• Body language (virtually or in-person) - together with voice and words personal presentation and movement will also give you valuable insight to the conversation;
• Allow thoughts to be finished before moving on - don’t ‘fill in the blanks’ - ask questions to get the full message, and then ask if it is complete don’t assume.
If it’s a written format (emails or chats):
• Make sure the message has a clear start, ask and finish; get clarification on the responses if you’re not clear;
• If the conversation is getting convoluted in writing ... pick up the phone!
With my art, I work somewhat in reverse - I begin with an internal conversation and when I put the painting out there I’m delivering a message. I appreciate that my intentions are not always what is received however I also know that they can act as a catalyst to open the conversation up and that is equally satisfying to me. If you work with introverts you might want to open the team up to this type of contribution.
All that to say — hear the people you’re interacting with so you that you receive their full intention.
Isn’t that what ‘active listening’ is about?
Do you solicit feedback from your team? Do you acknowledge it? If you are having a difficult time getting them to contribute their thoughts do you try other methods to attain them?
If you don’t or aren’t able to incorporate their input into a plan do you communicate the reasons to them?
Your consideration of these thoughts and relay of information to them on all of this, will help them feel heard even if you can’t accommodate their ideas.
Feel free to share some of your own checks and balances...
the painting featured above: k klucowicz — 'focus', oil on canvas, 11x14"
for those of you that don't know... I work in two series the first centers around the strength of individuals
and the second on how that strength affects relationships.
The message I am putting out with this piece is about leaning in to feelings, creativity and how to put them out there.
It was the first of several pieces I produced on a creative retreat. This painting grounded me to determine where I was at in that moment and how I could move forward to put new concepts out there. In case you were wondering...
Was that what you were thinking it meant?, love to hear your thoughts, karen
oh and ps! the title bar painting is called 'articulation'!
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